A New Definition of Difficult

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Just. one. more. step.

It's the marathon approach to life.  If I can just keep going…

I say that a lot.  But even as I make it sound hard to do, I'm sort of preaching to the choir of me.  Through rain, snow, sleet, and hail, I do keep moving.

I'm realizing that the real difficult for me (and therefore what I talk about less frequently) is:

Lack of control.  Duality.  Messiness.

Yesterday I had a lot of practice.   For your consideration and mine, a modified definition of difficult:

— Knowing what to do when your 15 yr-old son decides not to share any of the cinnamon rolls he's been given as a gift with the rest of the family, but then says something kind and tender-hearted to his 11 yr-old sister.  Scold him, appreciate him?  Both?

— Telling a business partner that the best way to get a deal done is to circumvent you.

— Realizing that being stuck in a girls' club is more your own doing that you had initially supposed. “I have seen the cause, and the cause is me.”

— Saying no when you don't mean maybe.

— Transacting like you believe the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.

— Sharing enough with a new friend that you can become friends, which come at the cost of feeling a wee bit vulnerable.

— Sticking with learning something new (like doing the codeacademy tutorial with your daughter) even though you feel kinda dumb.

— Asking for what you think is fair, at the risk of not being liked.

— Ending the day feeling discombobulated, but being ok.

— Seeing my character under construction, and rather than putting up a “Don Not Enter” sign while I'm being remodeled, invite them in to see the work in progress.

Said Helen Keller, “Security is mostly a superstition. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” 

On second thought.  This is its own kind of marathon.

Just. one. more. step.

Is your definition of difficult really that definition?  Or are you actually pretty good at that kind of hard?  What's your real difficult? 

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